How to Know When You Need Therapy
Let’s talk about when it might be time for you to consider seeing a therapist.
I was listening to a podcast that was interviewing therapist and New York Times bestselling author Lori Gottleib. The podcast host asked her, “how do you know when you should go to therapy”. Lori answered using a common metaphor in the mental health community. She compared mental health to physical health. If you are having chest pains, you go to the doctor. You don’t wait until you have a heart attack. So why not do the same with your mental health?
You might be wondering what the mental health equivalent of chest pains looks like. This can be a complicated question to answer, but we will provide some examples. If you are noticing burnout, feeling mild anxiety, or having relationship challenges, developing a therapeutic relationship could be helpful. Burnout has many different symptoms that vary wildly from person to person. Some signs include dreading Mondays, increasing irritability towards others, a decrease in compassion and general fatigue. Mild anxiety also has a varied presentation. Anxiety can be second guessing yourself, difficulty unwinding at the end of the day, or even a greater sense of fear.
Here are some concrete signs that you should consider mental health therapy.
You have noticed significant and lasting changes to your eating and/or sleeping habits that have begun to impact your quality of life.
You feel less motivated or less interested in things you used to enjoy.
You are isolating or distancing yourself from loved ones. You might say yes to invitations, but bow at the last minute because of social anxiety or tiredness. You might notice the invitations are dwindling. You might even feel irritated when you receive invitations.
You notice your coping mechanisms are less effective - whether that be your weekly yoga class, your gratitude list, or a call with a friend. Activities or individuals that used to bring you relief just are not doing the trick anymore.
You have recently experienced a loss or a traumatic event that you need help processing. Trauma doesn’t just mean assault or combat, it can also mean a big change, an unexpected job loss, a betrayal or even a car accident.
You feel less connected to your sense of self. Making decisions is hard. You don’t feel like you know what you want or who you are.
You find yourselves engaging in more risky or harmful behaviors like excessive substance use, shopping, eating, or gambling.
You feel like overwhelmed is your new baseline. The to-do list is growing faster than you can check things off. Maybe you find your thoughts racing or sleep is becoming more difficult.
You have the thought that nothing is going to change. Negative thoughts and hopelessness are spiraling.
You hear from loved ones or colleagues that they notice a change in your behavior.
You are struggling to control your reactions and your emotions. When you feel something, it impacts the rest of your day.
Preventative care is easier to implement and prevents unnecessary suffering. If you are asking yourself if you should go to therapy, go to therapy. Just like if you are noticing pain in your body, you would book an appointment with your doctor. Tune up your mind like you would tune up your body.
The perception of mental health has begun to change. The perception of seeking mental health care is starting to as well, but it still might not be the first thing that comes up when we are struggling to manage a stressor in our life. This is actually the exact time therapy can be most effective. Think of it this way, why struggle unnecessarily?
Therapy is a space for you to look inward. Rather than giving up your control, see how you can adjust your reaction. Understand why you have that response. Link current behavior back to adaptive coping strategies. All of this can help you evolve into who you want to be AND better manage your current stressors.
Not everyone needs to be in therapy for a prolonged period of time. As a therapist, our goal is to make ourselves unnecessary, to help you learn and grow so our assistance becomes redundant.
If you related to anything in this post and think you might want some additional support, contact us today. We have a free 15 minute phone consultation where you can learn a little more without having to make any type of commitment.