Have Issues Of Identity Created Obstacles In Your Mental Health?
• Are you part of the LGBTQIA+ community and looking for effective mental health support?
• Do you find it difficult to live authentically within the hetero- and cis-normative frameworks that remain predominant in our society?
• Are you transgender and looking for additional support?
• Or are you hoping to become a better ally to a friend or family member who has come out as queer, trans, or nonbinary?
Perhaps you are struggling to feel embraced within your work, religious, cultural, or familial environments. You may be a member of the military, law enforcement, or other male-dominated industry in which you feel your identity is challenged or considered unacceptable. Or it could be that your family has responded to your coming out with intolerance or a lack of understanding.
Maybe you haven’t yet come out at all, and you’re looking for support about how to do so. Or perhaps you have come out (and maybe have even begun the transition process if you’re trans), but you’re wondering how to navigate the world of dating, workplace and family dynamics, or medical care. You might be grappling with a fear of rejection or a lack of vocabulary in connection with your identity, boundaries, and needs.
Alternatively, you may be an ally of someone in the LGBTQ+ community. Perhaps you’re unclear on certain terminology, or you’re unsure about how to sensitively ask questions concerning your loved one’s identity. You may be curious about LGBTQ issues, such as discrimination, the transition process, and the difference between gender and sexuality.
The LGBTQ+ population experiences mental health challenges at higher-than-average rates. You may be struggling with anxiety, depression, unresolved trauma, or even suicidal thoughts. It could be that you feel the need to hide from or withdraw from others to protect yourself or have developed low self-esteem. Maybe as a way of coping, you engage in self-harmful or destructive behaviors, such as substance abuse, high-risk sexual behavior, disordered eating, or a need to please others at the expense of your mental health.
You want to not only feel accepted—but embraced—by those around you. And though it may be initially difficult to navigate the world as an LGBTQ person, counseling can offer valuable perspective and an avenue for self-compassion.
All Of Us Exist On A Continuum Of Gender And Sexuality
No matter who we are or how we identify, we all have a place on the gender and sexuality spectrum. Regardless of our identity or sexual preferences, we all “come out” as who we are in some way or another. But while labels can be very helpful for finding community and spreading awareness, they nevertheless create social constructs and categories that can make the process of coming out as LGBTQ+ painful, confusing, and complicated.
Unfortunately, because we live in a hetero- and cis-normative society—meaning that we create cultural expectations around the ideal of the straight, white, cisgender male—it can be very difficult for us, especially those in male-dominated atmospheres, to veer from the norm.
Yet there have always been LGBTQIA-identifying members of all parts of our culture, even the ones considered macho. For instance, the RAND Corporation recently discovered that over 6 percent of the military population self-identifies as LGBTQ+¹. And though this number is actually higher than the percentage of the general population that identifies as queer, trans, or nonbinary, the military and other male-dominated industries remain a hotbed for discrimination and intolerance. When the Human Rights Campaign polled queer and/or trans sports players, for example, 82 percent said that they witnessed homophobic or transphobic language used in their sport².
Progress in these arenas is slow because all of the systems at play in our society—which include policymaking, education, and healthcare, to name a few—continue to be influenced by outdated, heteronormative principles. Not to mention, there is a lack of representation in our media that fails to value the perspective of non-heterosexual, non-cisgender, and non-white peoples.
This cultural rigidity has likely made it hard for you to come out, adapt, and find resources as LGBTQ+. But the culturally competent, LGBTQ-affirming therapists at bareWell can provide you with guidance and a pathway to healing.
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Counseling Allows You To Develop Self-Compassion And Explore Issues Touching The LGBTQ+ Population
We know from reputable sources in the LGBTQ+ community, such as The Trevor Project, that increased mental and emotional support for queer, transgender, and nonbinary or gender-nonconforming individuals greatly reduces the risk of depression, anxiety, and other obstacles to mental health³. And therapy can be a great resource for helping individuals to explore their gender or sexual identity and process the pain, trauma, and confusion that often accompanies the process of coming out.
The clinicians at bareWell have years of experience and insight working with LGBTQ+ clients. In addition, we have a therapist, Bryan Schnebelt, who is part of the LGBTQIA+ community and has both experience and passion for working with people who are struggling with related challenges. At bareWell, we believe the therapeutic alliance to be the most meaningful component of LGBTQ+ counseling, as it provides an expectation-free and safe space where you’ll be given an opportunity to explore your self-image and develop skills for coping, emotional regulation, and self-care.
We approach LGBTQ+ counseling from a strength-based and trauma-informed perspective. That means that we know how to gently uncover painful parts of your past while building on your natural skills and abilities for resilience. In addition, we use art and expressive therapies to help you to verbalize your identity and take control of your life’s narrative.
As you begin to integrate the fragmented parts of yourself—i.e., the parts that are confusing or create shame—you will then be better prepared to effectively engage with others. Whether this means learning to communicate, set boundaries, or assert your desires, your bareWell therapist will empower you in finding your authentic voice. Moreover, you will gain a deeper awareness of triggering scenarios that cause you to feel unsafe. And for those of our clients who are transitioning, we offer mental and emotional support to accompany the physical transformations taking place.
Of course, we offer support to allies as well. If you’re struggling with feelings of fear, loss, and confusion as you navigate the identity of a loved one, we can help you to adapt and learn affirming language and positive communication techniques.
You don’t have to suffer alone anymore. It’s possible to feel cared for, understood, and embraced by yourself and the world around you. Your voice is yours to use in whichever way you choose—and with LGBTQ+ counseling at bareWell, we can show you how.
Maybe you’re considering LGBTQ+ counseling, but you have some concerns…
What if I’m not ready to come out yet?
This is a very common fear when it comes to counseling the LGBTQ+ community, and we recognize the very delicate nature of the coming-out process. At bareWell, the therapeutic space is entirely yours and we would never pressure you to come out or share anything that you don’t want to.
Moreover, we acknowledge that within this community, a wide range of issues exist that go beyond matters of identity. Even if you identify as LGBTQ+ but struggle with mental health issues that don’t seem directly correlated to your gender or sexuality, we welcome you to counseling.
I’m worried that if my therapist isn’t trans, they won’t understand my struggles.
We understand that a cisgender clinician may have limitations when it comes to understanding your experience as a trans individual. However, one of the foundational elements of our approach to the client-therapist relationship is that no one could ever fully access your unique point-of-view, no matter how you identify. As such, we want you to direct the process of therapy and feel empowered to maintain authority over the narrative surrounding your gender identity—and LGBTQ+ counseling can help you to do just that.
How can I support someone in my life who has just come out as LGBTQ+?
The best way to support a loved one who has come out as LGBTQIA+ is to listen and validate their experience. Counseling can help you to understand the correct verbiage to use and how to communicate your feelings in an affirming way. In addition, there are several resources that offer great information about how to be an effective ally. You can find some of those listed below:
https://www.glaad.org
https://www.glaad.org/resourcelist
https://www.hrc.org/resources/glossary-of-terms
https://www.apa.org/topics/lgbtq/transgender.pdf
https://www.apa.org/topics/lgbtq/orientation.pdf
You Can Learn To Treat Yourself With Acceptance And Pride
If you are LGBTQ+ and seeking support, connection, and guidance, counseling at bareWell can help you learn to embrace yourself and assert your needs. For more information about our LGBTQ+ affirming therapists or to schedule an appointment, please fill out our contact form.
¹ https://theoutline.com/post/5680/us-military-lgbt-population-size
² https://www.insider.com/professional-athletes-who-are-lgbtq#billie-jean-king-a-professional-tennis-player-was-outed-in-1981-1
³ https://www.thetrevorproject.org/2019/06/27/research-brief-accepting-adults-reduce-suicide-attempts-among-lgbtq-youth/