Building a Healthy Relationship with Eating: Mind and Body

Most of us can admit we have a less-than-healthy relationship with food, and subsequently our bodies, as a byproduct of negative habits. It's not uncommon to harbor unresolved trauma around feeding ourselves. Some people avoid struggling with food, and others are consumed by negative emotions around food every day. Regardless of how you view your body and feel about mealtimes, you should know there's a reason behind those feelings. This is why today we will explore the way our minds affect our relationship with food and the psychology behind our habits; along with some tips on how to hack mealtime, and rework negative mindsets to help us feel our best.

To start, it’s important to understand how our mind affects our eating habits. A good deal of our habits stem from subconscious places. Most of our behaviors are based on preconceived notions that affect our subconscious mind, or from dissonance with other factors in our lives. For example, as a child, you may have had a parent who would restrict your intake of food, or discourage sweets or junk food. Because of this, you may develop guilt around consuming those kinds of foods as an adult. It may also lead to a fixation on eating healthy foods, or behaviors around compensating for poor eating such as excessive exercise. Often this is related to our feelings of having control over our bodies and experiences. In childhood, not having control over certain aspects of our life may later manifest as an overabundance of control-seeking in adulthood.

Healing those parts of yourself can make it easier to let go of negative patterns in your eating habits. This is not an easy task, but leaving these wounds untreated may lead to serious health complications which can include eating disorders. The National Eating Disorder Association (ANAD) has found that as of 2023, over 9% of the population suffers from some form of eating disorder. Eating disorders are not limited to anorexia and bulimia, and can contain myriad symptoms including binge eating, disordered and restrictive eating, excessive exercise, purging, hair loss, internal bleeding, depression, anxiety, body dysmorphia, and suicidal ideation. 

However, even if you never experience an eating disorder, the task of navigating today’s  expectations, beauty standards, diet culture, and exposure to “ideal” bodies on social media is enough to make most people think twice about indulging in their favorite foods. It’s important to consume healthy foods rich in nutrients, however, rewriting from a guilt-centric mindset around eating is essential to having a healthy relationship with your body and food. Remember, food is the fuel for your body and your mind, and without it, your functioning in both will suffer.  Eating a good meal can improve your alertness and energy levels, and getting all of your proper nutritional components will help you to have a healthier body and improve its function. 

If you struggle with losing or gaining weight, or managing to make sure you eat nutritionally dense meals at regular intervals, it may be helpful to take time to reflect on the reason you are struggling. Whether you have issues with consistency, convenience in your busy lifestyle, or have a hard time prioritizing yourself, there are workarounds for these pitfalls if you can adjust your mindset. Focusing on your health as an ongoing pursuit and rewriting some of the negative stigma around healthy eating is a good first step. Just like with exercise, if you stop consuming healthy foods all of the progress you have made will, in time, be lost.

Dieting may seem like the fast track to weight gain or loss, but studies have shown that this acts as more of a band-aid when it comes to your mindset around food. Many diets are based on restricting or cutting out food types, which has proven to be less effective than continual healthy eating in the long run. Focusing instead on moderation, or adding healthy components to less nutritious meals can ease the stress of avoiding foods completely. Also, it’s important to keep in mind that all foods can play a role in a healthy diet, and there is no need to fully avoid “bad foods.” Even commonly demonized food components like fats and carbohydrates, and cholesterol in healthy amounts are essential to a balanced lifestyle.

Another key factor in developing better habits is to have a routine that takes some of the mental workload off of mealtime. Having a few healthy meals that you know how to prepare, shopping for better options, and keeping unhealthy ones out of the pantry can make a big difference in your consumption. Not all healthy food has to be boring either; there are lots of delicious and nutritious meals that can be prepared easily at home. Another issue people face while trying to eat healthily is lack of convenience. If that’s the case for you, consider prepping meals or ingredients that you enjoy such as sauteed vegetables, or a hearty salad ahead of time. Giving yourself the option to pick something easy and that you enjoy will always give you the edge.

The last tip, and one of the most challenging, is making peace with your body and being more attuned with its needs. There is huge pressure to be the best version of yourself, and almost everyone knows that there is room for improvement. However, tying your worth to the aesthetic state of your body can be incredibly devastating for your mental health and self-esteem. Your body will change many times throughout your life. As you age you will be inevitably less fit than you were as a teen and young adult, and that’s okay. Focusing on health over weight, and being in tune with your needs can make the process of self-improvement through healthy eating easier. Treating yourself kindly and loving yourself through all of your phases can take away a lot of the fear around your diet. Keep in mind that deeming yourself a failure because of weight gain or not meeting your nutritional goals does not put you any closer to where you want to be. As always, have grace with yourself, and keep trying.

Building a positive mindset about food can be a struggle for anyone, but being in tune with yourself and your needs can make it easier. Being mindful of subconscious and negative thoughts around food, and reworking them into systems and behaviors that build you up instead of tearing you down can be the key to making positive changes in your lifestyle. As always, if you or someone you love is struggling with an eating disorder or other mental or emotional blockage around eating, you are not alone, and there are professionals who are able to help you. Most importantly, if you take nothing else away from this article, know that no matter how you feel about your body or your habits, you are worthy, and if you want to make a change, you are capable.